Yea, I was off work today. I had a wonderful day sleeping in then meeting Amy and Bernadette for lunch. Sheldon is feeling better and has finally released Amy from her care taker duties. Bernadette was becoming concerned as Amy was asking if she had in experimental drugs that might help Sheldon get better. Bernadette suggested several anti-psychotic drugs her company was working on. Though she was only joking Amy had seriously considered it. I’ve only been able to talk to Leonard on the phone this week. They have been having stormy weather and were asked to cut back on their internet usage. Leonard sounded fine but I could tell he was having a rough time of it. I really should find out where the North Sea is. I was doing pretty well until this afternoon when I got ready to write this blog entry. I found I was just sitting there thinking about Leonard, seasick and cooped up in his cabin and lab. It reminded me of when he went to the North Pole.
I thought about him every day when he was gone then. We weren’t together but I couldn’t wait to let him know we were when he got back. I’m the same way this time but we are together. I want him to come back so I can ask him a question. I know he wants me to. In fact he left it up to me after Valentine’s Day. Leonard told me he would never ask me to marry him again. I had to ask him. I’m scared of the question, the answer and the results. I love Leonard so much and I’ve finally got to the point where I want to ask him. Not to marry me yet but to be engaged and to live together. I want to tell people that this is my fiancé not my boyfriend anymore. If we could just keep the marriage thing open ended that would be so great. I wonder if he’ll go for that. But he has to really understand it and not just go along. I think we are there now.
There was a time where Leonard did things just to make me happy even if he didn’t like it. He and I have grown past that now. It’s more about what makes us happy. That is a pretty cool place to be if you ask me. So here’s my plan for the rest of the evening. I snagged the comforter off Leonard’s bed today while checking on Sheldon. I’m going to open a nice bottle of red wine. Then wrap myself in his comforter and watch Star Wars movies tonight until I fall asleep. My tribute to the man I love. Okay I might catch The Bachelorette as well before Star